Fibromyalgia is a blessing

I bet you're wondering what I'm doing writing a title like that? Has Kez gone crazy? Surely that can't be true?!

But yes, I do believe that suffering with fibromyalgia has been a blessing in disguise. And here's why:

Before I was diagnosed with fibro, I didn't really know where I was going in life or what I wanted to do. I was just plodding along, working my two jobs and feeling super tired in the process. But now, I have a focus - recovery!

Despite all the things that fibromyalgia does to a person, I think it also has the potential to do something great in someone. During my recovery so far, I have met some amazing physiotherapists who have guided me and helped me to discover more about myself and my process of recovery. I am way more productive than I was before because I understand the illness more. I understand what makes me feel happy and safe and what makes me feel sad or in danger. I know what causes me pain and I am slowly pushing that threshold each day without going too far and exhausting myself. 

This process is definitely not a quick one. You can't just do exercise for a week and hope you feel better by the weekend. The definition of 'Chronic' is: 'persisting for a long time or constantly recurring.' The definition of Chronic is not: 'Pain forever, no answer.' But it is also not something that you can sit and wait out or take a magic pill to heal yourself. It is tough, it is long and it is a battle. But it's a battle I'm willing to fight if it means my quality of life will be positively affected in the process. 

I've heard people say that a diagnosis makes everything worse because you have a label. But I don't think that it's the label that is the real issue here. I think that the real issue is what we do with that label. At first, to me, that label was like a tattoo. I told myself that it was permanent and that I'd never see any improvement. But now, that label is like a tool in my recovery and is therefore a great blessing. When I think of fibromyalgia, I ask myself the questions: 'How am I able to improve today? What can I do to recover?' and then I go and do whatever answers those questions. My diagnosis is a motivation and along with education and research, I'm much better off now than I was when I was clueless!

I've learnt that sitting around waiting for a cure is boring and I can't do that forever. I have to motivate myself with the possibility of recovery. The thing that gets me up and moving every day despite my symptoms is the fact that I could get better. 

But don't get me wrong, I know that self care is just as important, so every day I make sure that I do things for myself as well. I've learnt that if I need to sit down or lie down and rest, it is ok to do that. But that is not a permanent state. I will always get back up again and carry on running (lol I don't run, let's say swimming instead, I can do that!) the race. 

These posts are my motivation as well. They are a reminder of what I am doing and why I am doing it. Thank you for reading, it really does help me in my recovery to see people joining me in my battle and encouraging me to push on!

KP